Fieldtrip: Take 1!

Two weeks ago I brought Emma to school and was handed a permission slip for her to go on her first fieldtrip.  GULP!  Do you think I could let her get on a bus, go all the way to Little Farmer and pick a pumpkin without her Mama?  YEAH RIGHT!  Not happening.  No matter how much work is on my desk there is nothing more important!  We had a blast.  Weather was beautiful and she was beaming from ear to ear from the moment she stepped on that bus!  What a great day ... what a big girl!

Every Girl Wants to be a Princess

Or does every girl?  My kids ask me if I'm a Princess and I tell them "No, I'm the Queen and YOU are the Princess."  Maggie went through a phase where it was all things Disney Princess.  It lasted a few months and then fizzled - like Dora and Hannah Montana.  Emma on the other hand, L-O-V-E-S the idea of being a Princess in every way to everyone.  She knows that she has her beloved Grandma & Grandpa wrapped!  :)  She loves all thinks sparkly, pink and shiny.  What a girl!   Without further ado ... Princess Emma!

Happy 5th Birthday Emma Caroline!

Where does 5 years go?  I remember it clearly - it was one of the best days and worst days all rolled up.  I'll never forget holding her all warm and gooey and falling instantly in love.  But I also remember when she stopped breathing and was whisked off into NICU.  The first time we went there the nurse greeted us and her first question was if we wanted her to be baptised that night.  It was horrible.  I felt like someone was tearing my heart out.  But now I look at her and she's healthy, beautiful, smart, sassy, sweet and loves to cuddle more than anyone I know.  I love you Emma ... more that you'll ever know! 

Here's the birthday girl! We had a big party yesterday with a Mickey bounce house, cupcakes, lots of our best friends and family.  It was a hit and Miss Emma had a blast!

Its the Final Countdown!

Did you just sing the title of this post? I did. Well, in our house it is the FINAL COUNTDOWN! On August 30 Emma began counting the days until her birthday and now, birthday week is upon us. We have lots to do before the big party on Saturday but we're just about ready. I have goody bags to stuff, cupcakes to bake and decorate and then we're just about ready to party! For her gift, we are redecorating her room, just like we did for Maggie. She told us that she wanted a Pretty Princess Room so that's exactly what she's getting! I can't wait - I'm so excited to send my Birthday Princess off to school on Friday morning so the renovation can begin! So, as of right now ..... only 6 more days!!!

When I grow up, I want to be a Mom.

There are days that I think about what I always wanted to do and the truth is that all I've really ever wanted was to be a Mom. I didn't intend on being the mother that I am. I had always pictured myself being home, volunteering at school, making projects in my free time, participating in PTO. I have an enormous amount of respect for mommy's that stay at home full time. Now that the girls are growing and life is busier than ever I sometimes think that life sure would be simpler if I didn't work 40+ hours a week, didn't have a blackberry that doesn't stop or wasn't on the road so much. Although Maggie and Emma may not realize it at this point, I do this for them and to give them every thing and opportunity that I can. But mostly, I just want them to look back someday and think about the wonderful times that we had together and realize that they have always been and will always be the start and end to my day.

I watched them play yesterday at the park and as I was watching them I realized that although they will probably never remember the specifics of that day or that we even went at all but I will never forget watching my daughters and thinking about how when I was a kid my Grandma said "I love you" to me constantly. It drove me crazy and when I'd ask her why she said it so much she always replied with "someday when you have little girls you will understand." She was right. I do understand it now and I am so appreciative of everything she did for me. She made me the person I am. She would have been so in love with these girls - every once in a while I see a glimpse of her in Maggie. It's a look, the way she stands or the way she says something. So, to my girls, I was in love with you from the moment I first saw you and I've loved you more every day since.

We Will Never Forget

September 11, 2001

Morning Photo Shoots

I think that the first day of school photos for each of the girls inspired them to have a photo shoot every morning. As long as we have the time for it, which we usually do because I get up at the crack of dawn because I'm convinced that we'll fall short on time, I don't mind. Good morning!

Look Mom! It's like GLEE!

Just me and my girls!

I thought I was ready ... but I wasn't.

If you had asked me a month, week or 2 days ago if I was ready for Emma to start Pre-K today I would have responded with a "Aboslutely" or "Definitely" or even "I can't wait!". Then, 7pm last night hit and that took a drastic turn. All of a sudden it hit me. Emma isn't supposed to be going to school yet. She's supposed to be in sleepers waking up in the middle of the night for her midnight feeding. She's the baby that I layed awake listening to for hours to make sure that she wouldn't stop breathing. She's the baby that was carried around in her Baby Bjorn carrier every moment that I could keep her there. But she's not that baby anymore. She's growing up and it's happening fast. She couldn't have been more proud of herself this morning, or me of her. By 6:30 she was dressed and had the backpack on. I brought her in to the classroom and watched her head over to a table with 3 other kids - they were all stringing beads. I walked over and said "Well, Babe" and she looked up at me with her little lips puckered and waiting for a smooch. I gave her a kiss and she said "have a good day Mommy". I had to leave ... and FAST before I had another situation similar to Maggie's first day of kindergarten where I'm pretty sure that they almost called in a CPR expert. Anyway, I cried my whole way to work and even drove around for an extra 20 minutes so I could catch my breath and not look like an idiot when I walked in the door to my office. Through all of this, hours later I do realize that today isn't about me. It's about Emma. Although I'm sad to see that my baby is no longer a baby, I am thrilled to see the caring and loving person that she is becoming. She has so much ahead of her and I'm just lucky enough to call myself her Mommy.

This is Emma

When I brought her home from the hospital and she was nothing short of an angel baby, I knew it was too good to be true. Then she turned 1, never threw a tantrum or had a fit, transitioned to a sippy cup like a dream and ate anything I gave her, I knew it was too good to be true. When she turned 2 she was potty trained and did it all by herself and she religiously went to bed at 7pm and got up at 7am, I knew it was too good to be true. And then, she turned 3, then 4 and now almost 5 and she is still in the lovely routine of dropping to the ground flat and whining this moan that is like fingernails on a chalkboard - she does it without warning ... unless you consider the warning to be either "no, Emma" or "Let's go Emma" when she isn't ready. For example....


this was leaving Grandpa & Grandma's! Please, oh please, let this behavior end once school starts and the reality bug bites her right in the arm! :)

Blankie Love

When I was a little girl I had this blanket that was given to me as a baby but I never used it for anything other than my dolls. My grandma saved it and after she passed I found it in a trunk so I brought it home. I kept it as is because it smelled just like her so it was very special to me, especially when I missed her the most. After we found out that Maggie was on the way, when we decorated her nursery I hung this blanket on the end of the sleigh rung. This blanket was in tip-top shape - soft with nicely sewn satin edges. When Maggie was about 3 or 4 months old she pulled it into the crib from the edge and it has been history from there. This blanket is a part of our lives ... known as "white blankie", it goes with us everywhere. It's been to the doctor, the mall, restaurants, Disney World, you name it - it's been there. The satin edges have been re-sewn countless times and the holes throughout are no longer repairable. This "thing" means SO much to her that it has become her very special lovey and at this pace will probably be a part of her wedding dress!!!

Life Lessons

They say that you learn something new every day. I wonder ... who are "they" anyway? Well, whoever they are, they are right. For the past few weeks I can't help but think to myself, "what next?". Work is crazy busy, girls are starting school, Emma's birthday is coming so there is a party to plan and gifts to buy, Steve's classes, a tree fell on my mom's house/car and we're moving her ... what next? I'll tell you. Last night I was driving in bumper to bumper "rush hour" (does Appleton really have rush hour) traffic when the car in front of me slammed on her breaks and there was only one place for me to go ... her rear bumper. The kicker? No damage to her vehicle ... but the front of my poor Vue is a mess. There are no photos because frankly I'm still so irritated that my camera is not going to get a look at it. Anyway, where is the "lesson for today" is on your mind I'm sure and here it is. As I was feeling extra sorry for myself this morning Chuck gave me his words of wisdom for the day. Although it feels like the world is closing in on me, to other people, their problems are way bigger. Although it sucks there really are people with more weight on their shoulders and more crap to deal with. I know he's right ... but just for one more minute, I'm going to be really sad for me ... and then I'll get over it and be done!


This photo is for my darling angel baby that said to me this morning...
Emma: Mommy, how many more days until my birthday?
Me: 24
Emma: Mommy, all I want is a Princess Bedroom and a Princess Party. Are you a Princess Mommy?
Me: No Emma, I'm the Queen and you are my Princess and you my dear may have whatever you want ... you just have to wait 24 more days.

To my littlest Princess, your little face and voice and the way it feels when you cuddle in my arms makes every problem and worry fade right away. I love you baby!

And She's Off!!!

Today is the first day of 2nd Grade and we are all very excited! I still wonder where that baby girl of mine went but she's so much fun and growing up fast. Last night she set her alarm for 6:30 this morning but she woke up 15 minutes early. She hopped in the shower, ate breakfast and still had time to watch last night's episode of GLEE before we left. The ride must have seemed like an eternity for her because she asked me every minute "What time is it?". When we walked in to school she got in line to buy her lunch tickets, walked up the stairs and put her backpack and gym shoes away in her locker. Yes, LOCKER. My little baby girl has a locker and she's very proud of it! We are so proud of her today! Way to go Mags! We love you so much! HAPPY 2nd GRADE!!!